Man Sues Supermarket For Not Having Anything to Slip On

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Days after a woman was awarded more than $90,000 in damages for slipping on a grape in a supermarket, and another entrepreneur filed a claim for $50,000 for slipping on a banana while grocery shopping, a Lakemba man is now suing his local supermarket for not having anything on the floor to slip on.

“Being a simple working class man on the dole, my time is precious,” the victim said. “So after wasting six hours in my local supermarket looking for something to slip on without luck, I demand compensation.”

While circling the supermarket for spills, the man missed his favourite daytime TV shows and wasn’t present for the afternoon badge draw at his RSL club, an ordeal that his barrister claims left the victim “shaking from alcohol withdrawals”.

“This is another case of supermarkets bullying the small guys,” the barrister said. “First they went after the farmers, and now my client is being forced to live on just his dole payment due to the supermarkets’ competence.”

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