The son of deputy ATO commissioner Michael Cranston has publicly embarrassed himself and his family after being caught stealing just $165 million from Australian tax payers.
Speaking from his luxury yacht, an ATO spokesman described the alleged thief as “a disappointment”.
“I would’ve expected someone with that sort of inside knowledge to steal at least a trillion or three,” he said. “$165 million is House of Representatives sort of numbers. To get caught stealing such a small amount will bring shame on his whole family.”
Early reports from legal experts indicate that the man’s public shaming will be taken into account during the prosecution, with some suggesting he could avoid jail time altogether.
“I think he’s been punished enough,” one judge said. “He deserves a chance to redeem himself and be caught later in his career with a more impressive resume of fraud. He’s far too young and connected to be punished for this one mishap. And we need to think of what the family’s going through – this is the equivalent of Shane Warne’s son being bad at bowling.”
Government officials expressed surprise at the arrest.
“We didn’t even mean for anyone to get caught in this investigation, so I have no idea how he managed to get caught; it’s a true mystery,” a spokesperson said. “But public servants should take note of this and act immediately.”
The 13 other men caught in the investigation who did not have family connections were sentenced to life in prison without trial.