Housemates Urged to Aim for Poo Stains Before Xmas Guests Arrive


Male housemates in a share house in Sydney have been urged to aim for the poo stains built up inside their toilet, in an effort to make the dunny look respectable before guests arrive for Christmas catch-ups.

The man who came up with the idea said the toilet currently looked like they borrowed it from a three-day musical festival.

“I started to use the servo’s shitter across the road as even it was cleaner,” he said. “It was time to take action, and if we all do our part and focus our streams towards the offending chunks, we’ll soon have a Facebook chair sparkling like the eye of a pensioner hitting a 60-cent feature.”

Other housemates weren’t as optimistic about the plan.

“Look, it’s hard enough aiming inside the toilet let alone aiming for strategic targets within it,” one man said. “I think we’d be better to just chuck the whole thing out and buy a new one. It even smells dead.”

Another housemate said it would be better just to board up the bathroom door and make guests feel at home by inviting them to piss in the sink.